IN AUGUST 2015 I STOPPED ABRUPTLY AFTER HEARING THESE FEW WORDS
It was ten years ago that I heard a voice on the wind. It asked me to pick up a camera. I did.
Recently I heard that same voice. It uttered two words. Just two. No context, no why. No path laid out. No sense.
It said ‘Stop. Listen’.
I have an idea why, but that is simply an idea. My idea. The nature of paying attention to the wind is that one has no control over what it might say next.
The alternative is to not listen, and to forge down a path that one believes is right. But belief is very different to words carried on the wind.
ON STOPPING THIS IS WHAT I HEARD
Stop. Listen. Those were two unexpected and disconcerting words. Disconcerting because I realized that if I were to play the game honestly, then I might never write another word again. Or make another film.
I imagined how the next days, weeks and months might go. The review of a decade spent between endurance and severe light. But as I drew close to the task in hand I was overrun with the overwhelming sense that it was irrelevant.
Stop, listen. Those two words were the words. The words. There can be no grand plan. No plan to get to anywhere of importance or scale. Stop. Listen. The first impulse is the plan. That very first notion before the noise. It exists entirely without need, or reason why.
This is surrender. This is free fall. To be free one must fall. This is where adventure lies. It is a place I cannot not set out to convince the world of right or wrong, just that it is as it is. Pure unbridled attention of this wide wide world.
So my challenge therefore remains. To stop, and to listen. And then to create from beyond the shadows of doubt.
THE AUDIO FILM ABOVE
Film Subject JANE Douglas recently wrote these words :
‘It appears as though Nic has opened even further the aperture through which he will view the soul. As attention is the key navigational instrument he uses to do his work, then it seems to me that his attention has become even purer, even less encumbered by his own sense of self.‘
We had a telephone conversation, from which I made a FILM ABOVE in an attempt to articulate these three months. Jane, I have cut your words out. Apologies, but thank you for listening so intently.
You can download the MP3 HERE, for a short while. For dog walks and the like.